Many of us struggle to get things done – whether that’s a long term work project or simply folding the laundry (ok, maybe especially folding the laundry).

There are many wonderful motivational speakers and resources that offer anything from gentle encouragement to a proverbial kick in the rear to help folks accomplish their goals. I am not one of these people, and this is not a motivational article.

This is about the things we need besides motivation to accomplish a goal, and how to make those things work for you. 

We can’t stop habits from forming and nor do we want to!  Habits help us!  Habits are great when they work for us and not against us.  Whenever we want to change our routines, we need to change our habits.  This is especially true every time there’s a change in season or a change in routine.  Think back to the end of August and the beginning of September.  There’s a lot of change in a couple short weeks.  Not having habits and routines that support you can make changing things harder than it needs to be.

Changing habits can be as easy as making the new habit easy or making something we want to stop doing more difficult.  As humans, we naturally gravitate towards easy over hard - let that work for you in this case!

My favourite season is finally here!! Okay, almost – it officially starts on Saturday. I LOVE autumn and everything to do with autumn. I love the warm days and cool nights, the amazing food (the farmers markets are full of amazing food), chai, soups, all the cozy sweaters and so much more.

Saturday marks the halfway point between the longest and most Yang day of the year (the Summer Solstice) and the longest and most Yin night of the year (Winter Solstice). Yin and Yang will be exactly equal on Saturday. After Saturday, Yin will begin to grow as Yang begins to wane. This is a season of change, a season of pivoting. It’s an important season because it represents the bringing in of all the work that has been done this year. This might be work on your health, work on your relationships, work on your home, work on your business, work on something else entirely.

We’ve been chatting about how habits are formed, how they affect your daily life and how to start making changes. If you didn’t catch the previous two articles, you can read them here: How Habits Affect Your Life + How to Make them Work for You and How to Change Your Habits and Make it Stick - Part 1.

Simply put, habits are an unconscious response to a specific stimulus. If you get cut off in traffic, what’s your automatic response? If you’re feeling stressed, what’s your go-to solution? If your pet or child comes to see you and wants a hug, what’s your response?

In my work with adult clients, a frequent theme that arises during sessions is that of boundaries.

They are the limits we place to protect our needs, our hearts, our bodies, amongst others. Few of us have learned healthy boundaries during our childhoods, and the effects can be felt throughout our adulthood. There are many challenges in establishing and maintaining boundaries, but the most common complaint is what I would like to challenge.

When we stop to consider the myriad of things that can affect our mental health, our focus is so often on the negative. Things such as painful memories that have a detrimental effect on our emotional well-being, triggers that can take us from ‘OK’ to ‘Nope’ in no time at all. And while these definitely play a significant role in our mental health - or lack thereof - it is equally important to explore the power of positive experiences and emotions.

Positive experiences or ‘Glimmers’ as they are sometimes called, are the moments that bring joy, contentment, and a sense of fulfilment, and they can have an equally profound impact on mental health.

"Health is a state of complete physical, mental and social well-being and not merely the absence of disease or infirmity." - Health as defined by the World Health Organization

I've come to believe that if I want to thrive, I must invest in my health. If I want to merely survive, I can treat health as an expense and treat symptoms as they arise.  For years I treated my health as an expense and opted for the cheapest solution.  I struggled with iron deficiency anemia, chronic fatigue syndrome, debilitating periods and more.  Unlike most practitioners, I understand chronic illness and the struggles it creates because I’ve lived with it.

Couples counselling is always a learning experience for all parties. I wanted to offer a glimpse behind-the-scenes of couples counselling, but that is a tall order! Each session, each couple, is so unique; that processes vary tremendously. 

So, here are a few surprising lessons that I’ve seen couples learn during relationship counselling. 

For anyone who’s ever taken a flight, you’ve all heard the safety demonstration telling you to put your own oxygen mask on first, before you help others to do the same. This doesn’t just apply to flights, emergencies and cabin pressure changes.

The reality is, that as women, we need to learn to put our own oxygen masks on everyday.

Recently, I’ve heard from several women that they’re putting themselves last.  Some want to make a change and put themselves first and others have said that they “don’t exist” until a certain point because they’re so overwhelmed by life, the demands on their time and energy, as well as everything else that’s happening on a daily basis. This also includes caring for their loved one.

“I’m so bad”, she states as she reaches for a cookie. “No I can’t, I’m trying to be good” as she declines an offer of a homemade muffin. We’ve all heard these phrases, and have probably said them, or something similar, ourselves. When we pause to reflect on these phrases, we can discern how we’re assigning moral value to food choices. Letting what we eat determine whether we’re “good” or “bad”. Our worth is not based on which foods we choose to eat or choose not to eat. 

Are you looking for a practitioner who is kind, compassionate, empathetic and understands the health struggles you’re experiencing?

Andrea’s near encyclopaedic wealth of knowledge combines perfectly with her calm and compassionate nature to deliver an outstanding level of care.

At Dancing Willow Wellness, we pride ourselves on patient-centred care, and Andrea exemplifies this principle. She is always ready to meet patients where they’re at, and use her skills, expertise, and warmth to bring them closer to where they want to be.

Patients feel supported and heard throughout their journey and appreciate her kindness as well as the great results they achieve.

We’ve all had our fair share of stress over the last few years with the pandemic and all that’s come from that. Some of you have felt more stress with the loss of work, while others have felt like they have been working like a dog. Some people have been called heroes by some and spit on by others. We’ve also seen one of the most concerning protests in Canada in recent memory. All these events add stress to our lives!

Sleep is not self-indulgence or self-care. Sleep is a basic human need that’s critical to our health, well-being and self-preservation!

I'm choosing to start with this bold statement for a reason: from a young age, we're taught that 'sleep is for the weak’, that we can 'sleep when we're dead' and other detrimental beliefs about sleep. This is reinforced in our 20's and the belief that we can "do it all". North American culture has become one where sleep is thought of as a luxury we can't afford if we want to get everything done.

Like so many other teenage girls, I had no idea what to expect with my first period or what it'd be like throughout my life. I also did what so many other teenage girls before me did - I asked the women in my life. In this case, my mother and older sister.

While this may seem an entirely normal and reasonable thing to do, in reality, it isn't! If they don't know what a "normal period" is, how can they actually answer this question?! They can tell me what a "normal for them period" is but not a "normal period".

As winter approaches, bringing with it colder weather we find ourselves turning once more to warming, comforting foods, and yes, even the much-maligned Pumpkin Spice.