Like so many other teenage girls, I had no idea what to expect with my first period or what it'd be like throughout my life. I also did what so many other teenage girls before me did - I asked the women in my life. In this case, my mother and older sister.

While this may seem an entirely normal and reasonable thing to do, in reality, it isn't! If they don't know what a "normal period" is, how can they actually answer this question?! They can tell me what a "normal for them period" is but not a "normal period".

When I complained to my family doctor about cramps, I was given very strong painkillers. I was also told that some women have it worse than others and to manage the best I could. When I complained that the flow was too heavy, I was put on B12 supplements, told I was anemic and given the option of taking birth control pills (that's a nightmare story for another day). For the longest time, I accepted this as my lot in life and longed for the day it would stop.

When I was first told what a "normal" period and cycle were like, my jaw dropped and I was confused. Why didn't the women in my family know this? Why didn't my family doctor know this? Why was it that an acupuncturist was the one to tell me this? It shocked me to learned that my period and cycle was the furthest thing from "normal", that it had never been "normal". I was in my 30's and utterly gobsmacked.

What a normal cycle and period should be:

A normal menstrual cycle should be approximately 28 days. Plus or minus a day here or there but generally, 28 days.

A normal period should be 4-5 days. It should start, peak and then taper off. It should be slightly darker than if you'd cut yourself. The flow shouldn't be too heavy or too light.

That's it . It can be that simple.

If it's anything but this, then it likely isn't normal. I'll let you in on a little secret - if it's not "normal", then it's treatable! In this case, treatable doesn't mean prescription medication.

What a not so "normal cycle and period" might be:

For every woman, her cycle is a little different. The symptoms she deals with are a little different from others in her life. Her period can also shift and change throughout her life as well. This is why so many women complain about their period and often have a laundry list of symptoms that plague them.

The list might include things like:

• early, late or irregular periods

• long periods

• heavy periods

• cramps

• clots

• PMS

• depression, sadness, moodiness (aka the emotional roller coaster)

• migraines

• acne

• night sweats

• insomnia

• bloating

• and more.

In short - a monthly nightmare for some, a pain in the … for others and almost tolerable for a few.

The good news - you don't have to live with the symptoms you've struggled with! There are many things you can do at home to help ease your period and acupuncture is always a great option to truly regulate it.

Is your cycle early, late and/or irregular?

The timing of your cycle overall can be a challenge, especially when it's irregular!

One of my first suggestions here is to track it. There are a ton of apps these days that can help with this. Tracking allows you to gather much needed data:

• how many days is your cycle

• how long is your period itself

• how you felt through the month

• any breakthrough bleeding (bleeding at any time that isn't your period)

• and more.

Paying attention to what your body is telling you throughout the month (not only during your period) can be very useful.

Something else that may affect your cycle is which ovary you're ovulating from. This isn't as common but does happen - one ovary cycles on a different cycle than the other. This might be the left is 5 week cycle and the right is a 4 week cycle or vice versa.

This can make your cycle seem really really wacky because ideally, your body is shifting left to right in terms of which side is ovulating. To figure out if this is the cause of your very irregular cycle, look at every second cycle to see if there's a pattern.

How long is your period?

Another fun fact that isn't discussed much is how long a period should be. In short, it should be 4-5 days and this includes any spotting before/after what's considered a traditional period.

You might be one of those "lucky" women who only have a period for 2-3 days. While this seems great as a teenager and as an adult, it's not so great if you're trying to conceive. A short period could mean that the uterine lining isn't thick enough for implantation.

You might be someone who's period seems to last a week or more when you add in the spotting days.

This is a bit of a Goldilocks situation (especially if you're trying to conceive). Too long can lead to too much blood loss (that's up next) or too short can lead to either poor shedding of the uterine lining or insufficient blood creating the lining.

Is your period heavy?

Given the number of period products available these days, it's hard to tell what a normal volume of blood loss actually is.

If you're using tampons (more on this later), on your heaviest day, you shouldn't need more than a super every 5+ hours. If you're relying on a super or super plus and changing it every 2-3 hours (or less), that's a heavy period. If this lasts for more than one day or you're changing a super plus hourly, that's an exceptionally heavy period.

Period cups are a great way to tell exactly how much blood you're losing month to month as they usually hold a specific volume of blood.

Pads are typically hardest to tell what the amount of blood loss is as there isn't as clear a ranking system.

Is your period painful?

• Where there is no free flow, there is pain; where there is free flow, there is no pain

This is a Chinese proverb that really does translate literally when it comes to period pain and most especially cramps.

Depending on the size of the clots, there may or may not be increased pain or cramping when passing a clot. This typically shows up as lower abdominal pain but can also be lower back pain and occasionally pain down the fronts of the thighs.

Ultimately, periods should be entirely pain free. This isn't limited to cramps but also includes things like breast tenderness, pain and/or distension.

Do you have clots with your period?

Clot sizes can vary from very small (less than the size of a dime) to very large (more than the size of a Toonie or two dollar coin in Canada). Regardless of the size you're experiencing, simply put, you shouldn't be experiencing clots at all.

Clots are primarily made up of tissue from the uterine lining and coagulated blood.

This is also an example of where there is no free flow and the resulting pain (see above). For some, clots may be caused by the use of tampons impeding the free flow and shedding of the uterine lining.

I know that the idea of only using pads isn't a very popular one; however, it's the best option for reducing period pain and clots as much as possible before working on additional reasons why the pain and clots to be present.

PMS, Emotions & the Emotional Rollercoaster

Premenstrual syndrome (PMS) is often associated more with emotions like anger, irritability and/or a short fuse, depression, sadness and/or spontaneous crying for no specific reason, anxiety and mood swings. PMS is occasionally associated with physical symptoms like cramping and bloating.

Simply put, PMS is any symptom(s) that happens prior to the period beginning and typically stopping on day one of your period. PMS can start as early as 14 days prior to your period starting. This is why tracking through the entire month is important!

Symptoms may also include cramping, appetite changes, food cravings (hello chocolate my old friend!), insomnia, decreased desire to be around people, difficulty focusing, lack of concentration, changes in libido, bowel changes (more loose stools or more constipation), joint or muscle pain, headaches or migraines, fatigue, temporary weight gain due to fluid retention (3+ pounds per month), bloating, breast tenderness and acne flare ups.

When these symptoms are severe, it may be called Premenstrual Dysphoric Disorder (PMDD) which is a more severe form of PMS. This may include anger, irritability, anxiety, panic attacks, depression, suicidal thoughts, difficulty concentrating or focusing, fatigue or low energy, food cravings or binge eating, migraines, insomnia and mood swings.

Both PMS and PMDD can make life very unpleasant prior to your period starting.

When PMS blurs into period symptoms

Some of the PMS/PMDD symptoms mention above may also blend into your period itself and they don't seem to stop. This might include:

• cramping

• appetite changes and/or food cravings

• insomnia

• decreased desire to be around people

• difficulty focusing and/or lack of concentration

• changes in libido

• bowel changes (more loose stools or more constipation)

• joint or muscle pain

• fatigue

• bloating

• breast tenderness

• dizziness

• clumsiness

• hot flashes and/or night sweats (may or may not be connected to perimenopause or menopause

Final Thoughts

Are you feeling as surprised as I was when I first learned what a normal cycle and period was?

If you are, you're not alone! This is completely normal.

It's also normal to want to stop struggling with a less than stellar period and/or cycle. If you're suffering, click here and send me an email so I can help you figure out your next steps.

Andrea